Tag Archives: waiting

Comfort for a Hurting Heart

It’s been almost two weeks since I’ve written in here, and I do apologize for that, but there were reasons. You might remember the last post I wrote.  https://alisarussell.wordpress.com/2017/05/03/dealing-with-a-chronic-illness-even-if/ For the last twelve days, I’ve been in a caregiver and management role. There is something wrong with my husband, but we don’t know what it is yet. We are waiting on the results of a scan and for him to go to a specialist this Friday. Waiting is hard. Harder this time than it’s been for a while. It’s even harder because he’s our sole income, and we don’t know what’s going to happen. He is working this week because he has to, but I know it’s at the back of his mind just like it’s at the back of mine.

That’s not the reason I’m writing this morning though. I’m writing because I missed an opportunity yesterday. I missed an opportunity to be ministered to by my Christian brothers and sisters. I’ll be honest here. I have been overwhelmed by all the possibilities of what might be wrong, some of them very serious, some of them requiring surgery. Between being overwhelmed, feeling like I have to pretend everything is all right, and having a natural reticence to talking about what’s going on because others are uncomfortable, it was hard for me to communicate exactly how much I was hurting. It didn’t help that yesterday was Mother’s Day which is supposed to be a wonderful holiday, but is not for me for many reasons. I didn’t feel like I could truly express my hurt because I didn’t want to spoil things for everyone else.

So, I didn’t use words like I should have used them yesterday which is why I’ve turned to writing them down. I didn’t know the words to use. There is an example in Scripture though of not being able to use words. Romans 8:26 says, “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.” That comforts me. God heard my prayers and those of the ones who did pray for me even though I didn’t communicate well.

It was also hard, I think, for the people I did speak with to understand how I was feeling because my husband was at church. And that goes back to dealing with a chronic illness. Sometimes, he is okay, and sometimes, he isn’t. When he’s okay, it’s hard to impart that something might be serious at another point, and my feelings are just considered to be feelings of worry which, of course, God has told us not to do.

From Philippians 4:6-7, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

I acknowledge the reality of this Scripture. I do. I have prayed it a number of times in my life, and God’s peace has been there. But, when I state my concerns and they are dismissed as worry, I feel discounted by my Christian brothers and sisters. My heart hurt badly when one of them stated this exact thing yesterday and walked away from me. I quit talking then. There wasn’t a point anymore. I left church with my family, and they celebrated me well. We went to lunch, and then I went to spend the gift card they had bought me. It was a good afternoon, and God comforted my hurting heart. And isn’t that the point when we’re hurting? God is always with us, and He comforts our hurting hearts. I pray, if you are hurting, that He comforts your heart as well.

 

God’s blessings on all of you today!

 

Even in the Waiting, God is Able

I was researching a title earlier to make sure I had never written a post with the same title before since I try to be varied and different with my posts. Anyway, the title I was researching brought up three previous posts including one entitled “God is Able” which I posted at the end of 2014. I think God knew I needed to see it. I read through the post and realized I had done or was doing every single thing I had advised against doing back then. I started kicking myself. Maybe my thought life or my faith life wasn’t as good as it needed to be. Scratch that. I know my thought and faith life isn’t as good as it needs to be. I thought about re-posting that post today as it obviously was something I needed to see in print once more. Then I realized I had more to say so this post was born.

We are in a waiting period now for a visible source of provision for our family. It has been an ugly waiting full of tension and discouragement and heartache. As I’ve said in previous posts, I haven’t felt like I was doing a good job of demonstrating my faith in God though I’ve wanted to. I’ve constantly asked people to pray for me and have worried that I’ll wear out my chip with these people. I have hurt and ached for what seems like no reason at various points during my day. In other words, it hasn’t been easy at all for me.

God has been with me though, and today, I know He is able even though we are still waiting. I know this for two reasons. This morning I woke up feeling that the weight I had felt on me for the past several weeks was gone after I had gone to bed last night with a ringing and a buzzing at the back of my head that wouldn’t quit. It had become bad enough for me to have a concern I might need a medication change. But, when I woke up, it was gone. I felt different, and I knew it was from God.

The other reason was because of a quote I saw on Facebook, of all places, by Rick Warren. I know God uses people to bless others, and He knew that these words would encourage me. Here’s the quote.

“When you feel abandoned by God yet continue to trust, you worship him in the deepest way.”

I thought the feelings I had been having of abandonment had lessened my faith and made God not love me. There was nothing further from the truth. So grateful that God loves me even at my lowest point and that He is able even while we wait!

God’s blessings on all of you today!

A Day of Waiting

We all do it. Waiting is built into every moment of our day, every moment of our week, every moment of our month, every moment of our year, and every moment of our life. There are almost too many examples of waiting to list, but I’m going to list a few. We wait for our meal to be ready. We wait in traffic. We wait in line at the grocery store and at the Department of Motor Vehicles. We wait for our next vacation or the next holiday to come. We wait for the next phase of our life to begin. I could keep going, but I think you have the general idea.

However, we aren’t very patient with our waiting. Many inventions over the last hundred and fifty years have been things which have shortened our waiting time. Inventions such as the microwave, the computer, the Internet and email, the automobile, the I-Phone and texting, and the airplane have all been things which have improved life in our society. At the same time though, I believe they have contributed to the growth of our impatience. When, for example, is the last time you have heard of someone who has sent a letter by regular mail? We also get impatient when our next day package being sent by Amazon is not in our hands at the exact time they said it would be.

Over two thousand years ago though, this day was a day of waiting. Jesus had been crucified on Good Friday, and his disciples had fled. Mary, his mother, and his followers were all mourning His death. It seemed there was no reprieve. There was no Internet to send an email from Jesus saying, “Whoops, I was just kidding. I’m still alive.” No, on this day, everyone thought He was gone and wasn’t coming back. It seemed as if all hope was gone. They didn’t understand that Sunday was coming. They didn’t understand what Jesus had tried to tell them. They didn’t know the miracle that was about to happen.

We, on the other hand, know what happened. We know that Sunday came and that Jesus, who had died for all of our sins, came back to life on that day over two thousand years ago. We know Jesus is the Son of God! This knowledge of His death and resurrection and the grace He gives all of us if we would only believe spread all over the world. It didn’t happen instantaneously, but this knowledge couldn’t be contained, couldn’t be suppressed, and the disciples’ efforts all those years ago are the reason you and I know about Jesus today.

Waiting is not a bad thing then. Good things can come from waiting. So, the next time I get impatient over having to wait for something, I will remember that time over 2000 years ago when the world was still and when the greatest miracle of all time was about to happen.

God’s blessings on all of you today, and Happy Easter to all of you tomorrow!

Living in the Waiting

We wait for so much in our lives. We wait to finish high school. We wait to finish college. We wait to get our first job. We wait to get married. We wait to have children.  Etc. Etc. Etc. You get the idea. I’m in one of those waiting periods right now, and it is hard. It is hard to wait and not have control over situations like I think I should. It’s even harder when things don’t happen as quickly as I think they should.  Even when I’m waiting in line at the store or waiting in a line of traffic, I’m impatient for things to happen quickly so I can go about my merry way.

What happened to being patient though? What happened to just living in the moment? I think some of the answers to those questions are societal.  Society, especially Western society, says we should always be rushing to the next thing. The next thing will give us complete satisfaction in our lives like nothing else ever has, and it will be the proverbial brass ring that will slow us down. It never does though. It never slows us down.

What can slow us down? I think we need to look at Scripture to answer that question. There are many verses about waiting, only a few of which I’m going to quote here.

Psalm 25:4-5

“Make me to know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth and teach me; for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long.”

Psalm 46:1-3, 10

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling. Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!”

Psalm 37:7

“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.”

There are many more Scriptures about this, but I think these demonstrate the point well. We need to be willing to wait and to have patience while doing so. For those of who have given our hearts to Christ, this is paramount. If we truly have released control to God, we need to release control of EVERYTHING to Him. That doesn’t mean we don’t pray. It just means that once we’ve prayed, we give control of it to Him, and we don’t take it back. We live in the moments He gives us, and we don’t worry about the future. We see the beauty and the peace of living in the waiting. His beauty and His peace. I understand this in a way I’ve never understood it before because of everything I’ve written so far and because of what I learned in our Vacation Bible School last week. I will end with a quote from that study. “God has the power to provide! Hold on!”

God’s blessings on you today!!!