So, you’ve looked at this post, maybe because of the title I chose, and wondered what I’m going to say. 🙂 I promise, there is something of substance in my comments this morning and not just because I have what might be considered a controversial title for a Christian blog.
Over the last few weeks, I’ve shared a bit about my family situation and my feelings about what’s going on. Today, I want to talk about the messages Satan sends all of us. Once we’ve accepted Christ as our Savior, Satan goes on the attack and tries to minimize our impact on the world around us. He tells us how we can’t possibly be any good to God or to Jesus and that we should just stay quiet in church, not reading the Bible or sharing any of the gifts God wants us to share.
If none of those work and we start getting knowledgeable and participatory about the faith we’ve claimed, Satan goes even more on the attack. Bad situations, or trials, come into our lives, and we focus more on those than we do our faith. It’s understandable that we do. For example, if we are fighting an illness, especially one which has the potential to be terminal, there are doctor’s visits, treatments, and just the general fatigue and uncertainty of what it all means. Another example is job loss which comes with a concurrent loss of income. Searching for another job to replace the one lost becomes paramount in our minds, and other things in our lives get reduced to the sidelines. Now, I’m not saying this happens to everyone, but it happens enough that the example is relevant.
There are people though who remain strong in their faith through their trials and tribulations. Examples from Scripture include Job who lost everything, but refused to blaspheme God even though his friends were telling him to, and David who used many of the Psalms he wrote to lament the situations he was in.
For those people, I believe Satan gets inside their head and sends them messages from their past. These messages could be anything which would prevent God from working through them. That’s where I am now with the situation my family is in. I’ve been at a low point for the last few days and stuck at how I could get out of it. This is not a good thing for a person with depression. Satan has used this waiting time to screw with my head about how much God loves me and how much other Christians love me. I had been thinking I was ok with how much God loves me, but struggling with the other. Then I realized I was really struggling with both. And this was because of the messages Satan was sending me from my past. Messages that say I’m not loved because this situation hurts, because I don’t know when it’s gonna end, because I feel deficient as a Christian, and because I feel I’m gonna be rejected for showing hurt and pain.
God says it’s ok if I ask these questions though, and it’s especially ok if I ask them out loud. A lot of people in the church don’t. They feel like they have to maintain a veneer that other people can’t see through. And it’s my belief that we make it easier for Satan to repeat these messages over and over in our brains if we maintain this veneer.
I don’t want to maintain a veneer; I want people to see the person I am, even in the church, even with all my insecurities. God made me to be the person I am, warts and all, and I’m starting to think this is the gift He wants me to share, my honest presence, no matter how uncomfortable it might make people.
It has also helped that I’ve had someone tell me they were willing to pray with me every single time I needed them to through this situation. In previous churches I’ve been in, the general consensus has been to ask for prayer once and then never mention it again. I can’t do it that way. This is a situation that will be ongoing for a while, and I need to know people are praying for me, praying for my family.
Back to the beginning of this post and my title. What did I mean? I needed to get to a point where I could say something to what Satan was whispering my ear–the messages from my past–and get back to living for my Lord and Savior. I can say it now. SCREW THE MESSAGES, you are whispering in my ear, Satan! I am not listening to you anymore! I will live for my Lord and Savior during this time of waiting!
God’s blessings on all of you today!